Fast-food giant KFC announced it is eliminating bones in chicken as of April 14, but thank God only in its 4,500 US locations (the Europeans and Asians are safe). Muscle meat will be stripped off the bones, ground into paste and Super-Glued unto edible Popsicle sticks shaped like breasts, wings and thighs.
Eventually KFC will use only meat from boneless chickens, which are being genetically altered and bred in a secret location, (coincidentally the same location where KFC mixes its secret recipe).
The move came after research showed that younger people, who are the only consumers who count, don’t like bones.
SpokesHen, Chicki-“Little Red,” Gonzalez of the Society for the Preservation of Chicken Bones, issued a statement condemning KFC’s action. “We’ve got some bones to pick with you KFC!”